Winter in July 2010

I can't wait for Season 4 of 30 Rock to release


I believe that iPods and iPhones
are created by aliens
so that they can easier abduct us


For those who dun read my main blog
I went for a hitchhiking trip in Aussie
Find out more at mydemoninyou.blogspot.com


I refuse to let Megan Fox wash my car
after her plastic surgery


My new housemate has really shiny orange hair


The other night we were watching 7eventy 5ive DVD
her hair kinda lit up the room


TV convinced me that you can bribe policemen with donuts


I get a lot of people asking me
if Singapore is an Islamic country
due to the stars and moon
They are not convinced with the knowledge
I acquired from Civics and Moral Education + Social Studies + National Education


Whenever I feel moody
I do impulsive shopping at the supermarket
I have a year's supply of snacks and tidbits, I believe

Keep Rollin'

Towards July in Brisbane..

There's this friendly CityCat ferryman, Anakin
I would ask him every week if the ferry goes to Sydney


I discovered the Genie's secret to his perfect body
when I bumped into him in the gym the other day...
He drinks GNC's Testostro Grow Ultimate Nutrition ($119.95)


I dun understand why women kick such a big fuss
about guys staring at their boobs
I can easily name 10 girls who stare at guys' groin
Come on.. take it easy!
Human are just more sophisticated beasts.


I vaguely remember a childhood game
that is the exact duplicate of "Johnny Johnny Woosh"
except we say "妈妈叫我不要脱底裤"
(means: My mother told me not to take off my underwear)


I carry body sprays everywhere I go
and keep 3 different types of air freshners in my room
One of which I rarely use because
it smells like a typical toilet air freshner
and it kinda simulates defecation


I used to hear strange noises
thinking that my house is haunted
Ya know, I'm a very impressionable teen
especially when movies like Godzilla is part of our culture


I recently got to know that you can pay for your assignments to be done
by specialists whom the Chinese people call "枪手" (Snipers)
However, their services are very costly
Now the mystery is solved about how these people
who cannot even comprehend the lecturer, can ace their assignments


With the increasing trend to healthy lifestyle and organic products
Here's a business idea - Delicious Nail Clippings for Strong Bones
or Organic Toilet Paper for Extra Fibre in Diets


For those who still do not know that I do radio shows
You may tune in to my show every Sunday
8pm (Singapore) 10pm (Brisbane)
Radio4EB FM98.1
Stream live at http://4eb.org.au/listen/

FIN!

BATTLE OUT!

June = Winter 2010

Congrats to Alness + Lynnie
for their latest addition to the happy family! =)
LCP Tay is hereby promoted to CPT of the Household


I felt something missing this morning
when I went to pang-sai (take a dump)
Ivy wasn't washing her clothes in the toilet
so there's no excuse for me to rant
in response to her "give me 5 min, slow poke!"
Ivy moved out 2 days ago...


"Now son, that you're enlisting, I forbid you from wearing your floral dresses!"
Enjoy your two years of conscription, Jonathan Chan.
You will be missed.


Two alternate ways to study 2007PPP Legal Issues for Managers
1. Watch Wall Street (1987) featuring Charlie Sheen
2. Watch The Exorcism of Emily Rose (2005) featuring Cain, Nero, Judas, Iscariot, Legion, Belial and Lucifer


Watching movie with Oyama-san is quite an experience
She seemed to be able to put herself in the pain of injured characters
Also, all the "痛い" ("Itai") makes me feel that i'm watching Japanese AV at the same time


I have one month left to investigate
my theory of a werewolf (lycanthrope) living in my house

Comic Updates from Brisbane

Pardon me for the bad drawings
(not that it was any good)
the weather has been quite harsh in Brisbane
and I have frozen fingers

Enjoy! =)


My Burmese classmate is a huge fan of Sentosa's Songs of the Sea
He's often found singing "Singaura Oh Singapura"


We went to Ajisen Ramen after uni
and shared some ghosts stories
Amanuma had some first-hand experience in Australia


Spent an enjoyable day at DAYBORO RODEO
Why are lifestocks so smelly?


Have you ever wondered if we were all living under a
ginormous air-conditioning system?


I think I make a good 5th member
in the Big Bang Theory geek crew
And I get to steal Penny from Leonard.
They need an Asian dude..


An Aboriginal woman got physical with our fellow Singaporean
a week ago, she was scared shitless.
Yes, it was just across the road from the Police Station.

If I can recall whoever told me Brisbane is safe,
that person is going to get a punch in the nose from me.
Or maybe in the nuts.. whichever hurts more!

APRIL BRISBANE 2010

A lot of girls failed to realise that
guys remember their boob size the previous time we saw it
and have long learnt the technology of miracle bras
Girls need to be more consistent!


Buddha says,
"You're invited to my birthday party this Sunday at South Bank.
You may bring a plus one!"


Brisbane Best Breakfast Restaurant, Gunshop Cafe
has all these huge bust starring at you..
And I have these phobia for manequins


I believe that Ibis are
reincarnation of balding old men


I think there's a secret CCTV in my room
My housemate Ivy always know when I'm studying
and will bring me some tasty soup or thai food.
Also kelly always know when I'm playing Social City on Facebook..


Went to Sono Japanese Restaurant with Zin and Amanuma
We were so overwhelmed by their Japanese waitresses..


My new housemate, Scott is an engineer...


He watches television in the dark at volume zero
I think he wants to learn lip-reading or
had inspired to be a mime artist since young


Tipsy Aussies like to sneak up and "BOO!" you
very often lie on the tarmac road, pee on your car etc
I believe I have a very bad and different sense of humour.
My Aussie housemate explained its call the Queensland Down Syndrome


I was denied entry when I wanted to poop
by our house cleaner
I think he makes a good goal keeper..

BRISBANE UPDATE

Everything here is so big and huge
you'll definitely need a wide-angle lens camera
Fortunate for me, my 17-40mm f/4L never fails me


There's a culture of thanking the bus driver here
I cannot imagine whats gonna happen if you thank
your Singapore SBS bus driver
(speech reads: shut up! get off the bus already)


I saw a Japanese guy on the bus today
wearing a Nin-Buta t-shirt
You know? Ninja Pig?
I thought it was pretty funny.
Oh yes.. I can read, understand but by choose do not speak Japanese


Would love to see this in our annual parliament talks.


There are No Smoking signs everywhere
but ash trays and smokers beside everyone of them
Ya know what? This is a FREE CITY!
And I'm lovin' it!


I dunno if its the same for everyone
As an international student here..
I calculate even the slightest bit of cost-satisfaction ratio.